Things I’m noticing about my cycle

a new essay + weekly things

Despite always having a tough time with my menstrual cycle, it wasn’t until my early thirties when I interviewed the author of Period Queen, Lucy Peach, that I began to really pay attention to its impact on my mind, creativity and daily life.

For a while, I added the four hormonal phases into my Google Calendar—“dream” (menstruation), “do” (follicular phase), “give” (ovulation), and “take” (luteal phase)—so I could keep them in mind when making plans. I’d feel more energetic in the follicular phase, and more generous during ovulation. I started adding notes about how I was feeling each day, and comparing them to the previous month to find patterns.

Yet, as in-tune as I have become with my cycle, there’s still amnesia. Despite knowing what to expect from the luteal phase, when I’m in it, it’s like I’m experiencing it for the first time.

Flatness. Fatigue. What excited me last week has suddenly lost any sheen. I'm pushing through a fog of inertia.

I forget that I’ve been here before, that this is my rhythm every month, that I have felt different and will feel different to this again